The worst possible walk up music

Walk up music. It's designed to pump you or your fans up as you walk up to the plate. It should have a good beat or riff for the 6 seconds or so as you are entering the batters box. That said, here are 5 songs that completely awful for that.

1. Babe, Styx

Ooh, yeah, gentle piano followed by the dulcet tones of Styx.

2. Shine on you Crazy Diamond, Pink Floyd
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SqFPNTBnv8
Ten minutes! Ten freaking minutes, and the song never really starts. Not good for a baseball game.

3. Hot Potato, The Wiggles

Actually, you know what, this isn't so bad

4. All I want for Christmas, Mariah Carey

The one advantage is that this would be confusing as hell for any opponent

5. Zombie, The Cranberries

I'm looking at you, Matt Tolbert.

Yours in the comments!

I would like to write a song

At work the other night, we were listening to the radio when that song "Fireflies" or whatever by Owl City, who happens to be from Owatonna, just down the road. This guy made a stupid song on his stupid keyboard about insomnia. I could write a song or two as well, I bet. I got some great ideas for an entire album, based solely on my hypoglycemia.

Track 1: Juice. A song about how I need sugar or I am going to pass out.
Track 2: Bread, please. Delves into my need for complex carbohydrates.
Track 3: Vertigo. A song about what it's like to get the spins. Uno! Dos! Tres! Catorce! I need to sit down!
Track 4: Adrenaline. A nice diddy about how my damaged adrenal glands lead to a proclivity for panic attacks.

I was thinking about maybe throwing in a few songs about my other medical maladies on the B side of the album.
Track 5: Astygmatism. A ballad dedicated to my terrible vision.
Track 6: Under Pressure. High blood pressure that is!
Track 7: A man my age should not feel pain like this. A song about heartbreak... after finding out you have arthritis at 21.
Track 8: Out of My Hands. A song about how everything falls out of my grasp. Because I have ridiculously undersized hands. It's a nightmare, really.