Monday, June 29, 2009

I'm obliged to comment on this

Last week, the sports world was on pins and needles, waiting to see the newest fashions from those beacons in of haute couture in the sports world, the Oregon Ducks. Well, the new unis were released last week, and I received more tips on this single topic than any other in the history of the site. It appears as though I have developed something of a reputation when it comes to getting under the skin of Oregon fans.
Usually, I like to wait until the season has begun and see for myself how the Ducks have offended everyone's vision, but this time around, I'm going to go for the preemptive strike. First, let's take a look at what Oregon will be offering.


Let's recap my qualms with the Oregon uniforms of years past.
1.) There were too many.
2) They were sensationally offensive to anyone with the ability to see.
3) They were stupid.

I'm happy to say for anyone that has to watch the Ducks this year, that the colors have been toned down quite a bit. Thank goodness for that. The other two problems, however, the number problem and the stupid factor are still in full effect.
Let's review: There are 5 different jerseys, 3 pairs of pants, at least 4 helmets and only 12 games. Way to build brand identity, guys! Also, the feathers that we so stupid? Still there.

Admittedly, the uniforms are much better looking, mostly because of the toned down colors. Also, they lost the truck step pattern of the old uniforms, but honestly, I don't understand what compels Oregon to keep doing this. I understand that Nike is a huge donor to the university, but doesn't this just convey to prospective students that all the money goes into the athletic department? Everyone has a deal with an athletic apparel company, but holy cow. Different uniforms every game of the season for about the past 3 years?
I don't know who they hope to rope in with this scheme either. I mean, the devoted fans will remain devoted and will tell people they love the uniforms and shout down bloggers who, like the rest of society, think the choice in apparel is asinine. Prospects, I'm sure, would be more concerned with whether or not the school is able to beat USC, rather than how fly they look in their winged jerseys. (Get it?!) After much thought, the only new fans you might garner are youngsters flipping through the channels, thinking they have come across an episode of Power Rangers. Eventually they are going to start asking where Megazord is. There's not any Megazord, Oregon!
In conclusion, your uniforms are dumb, Oregon.

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